Women's magazine headlines I'm fed up of seeing .

I used to love women's magazines. I constantly had a pile of Cosmopolitans etc stacked up by my bedside. I used to immerse myself fully into the world of celerity dieting. I was positive that I could get a man to fall in love with me in 5 simple steps. I would circle all the bikini's that would 'give me killer boobs'. I would endure sex position of the week (if you are not a barbie, the wheelbarrow can cause injury and embarrassment.) Suffice to say, I fell for all the shit. That's all it all is, shit. Women's magazines should be empowering, they should offer solid advice, they should explore the real issues we face, they should NOT be dictating what a 'real' woman is, should NOT be telling you all the ways to please your man and by all means should not be encouraging unhealthy views on body image.

( Please note: I actually think sex position of the week was the best thing to happen to women's magazine and nothing is more entertaining than seeing Barbie and Ken do it.)

'How to keep your man happy in bed'

Why? Why do we need to know this, surely keeping yourself happy in bed comes before this? This is a women's magazine so why is it all about pleasing men? I'm confused! By all means, I'm not saying you can't want to please your sexual partner, but why are we concentrating on the mans needs as if he's the only one who enjoys sex? If you want to know how to please a man in bed, ask him. But firstly find out what YOU like. If you want to read about sex I suggest you quit the shitty glossy weekly's and explore some better material. I suggest thedebrief, aft magazine, girlonthenet etc. Have fun and happy climaxing!

'How to get the perfect bikini body'

And what is the perfect bikini body? If they are wanting me to end up looking like Michelle Keegan, that's just never going to happen. Encouraging women to look like these celebrities is just setting up a bunch of women to fail at something. I diet, I detox and sometimes (rarely) I work out. I do this to make the best of myself, I will never be a Victoria's secret model but magazines are telling me that I can be. Women are under enough pressure as it is, we don't need pressure from an industry that should be supporting us. There is no perfect bikini body. The perfect body is the one you feel comfortable in. That's it. That is literally the perfect body. Delete your 'thinspiration' Pinterest board, concentrate on being healthy and happy.

Okay so this one isn't so much of a heading more so a popular story. 

Bringing women up only to knock them down. So often I see a celebrity in a magazine having their praises sang, a double spread of pictures letting us know where they got their clothes from, what they ate/didn't eat to get their new figure, how they got their man etc. Then a following issue slating their life decisions, a bad angled bikini shot showing how much weight they've gained and how they've hit rock bottom. The media do this too much, they love to put a woman on a pedestal, give her everything, then cackle as they push her off and watch her fall. Watching magazines slate celebrities is like watching rodents at dead animals. It's disgusting. Why are women's magazines full of negativity towards other women? Shame on you badly written glossy's.

'Turn to page 5 to see how she lost her baby bulge!'

This is one of my least faves. Having not had a child myself I can't fully imagine what it would feel like to read something like this. Having a baby is something that a lot of women will experience, it's an amazing moment for a woman to give birth and spend those first few months bonding with a person that they have been growing! The nearest thing I have come to that is growing a pepper plant and then getting to eat it. (It gave me a reaction and my lips swelled to triple their original size.) The focus on pregnant women should not be the way they look, how they 'wear their bump with style' and how quickly they managed to become size 6 again. Of course women would want their bodies back, it must be hard seeing such a dramatic change in yourself but if I had just had a baby I wouldn't want the pressure of working out each day to look 'good' again. And to the mags that keep saying how to 'wear your bump with style', you wear it on your fucking tummy because that's where it's kept until it comes out your vagina. You idiots. Being pregnant is an amazing thing but let's not focus on the fact that it's caused a giant bump to appear, there is more to a pregnant woman than being pregnant. Dawn O'Porter rants about this quite brilliantly on her Twitter account.

So there, I've had my little rant on the internet, I really hope women begin to notice the shit that gets thrown on and into these magazines. If this wasn't enough I strongly recommend checking out The Vagenda: a Zero Tolerance Guide to The Media.

Slut Shaming. Let’s just stop it yeah

So what is slut shaming? Well, here’s something I pinched from Wikipedia, source of all 100% accurate information about pretty much anything. ‘Slut shaming (also hyphenated, as slut-shaming) is a concept in sexuality. It is a neologism used to describe the act of making any person feel guilty or inferior for certain sexual behaviours or desires that deviate from traditional or orthodox gender expectations, or that which may be considered to be contrary to natural or religious law.’

So in other words, when a girl is more sexually active than average, she gets tarnished with the horrid and disgusting word that is ‘slut’. What is a slut? Most people just call a girl a slut because she’s maybe prone to having one night stands, or wears provocative clothing or speaks in an open and crude manner. My mum often calls me a slut; I’d say she’s called me a slut every week of my life since the age of 11. Of course, my mum still uses the word ‘slut’ in the old fashioned way. A slut used to mean a messy and untidy girl. So by definition, I’m a massive slut. But by modern definition, am I slut? I don’t believe I am but chances are; I’ve been called one.

Slut shaming has only really recently become recognised as a ‘thing’ although it’s been around forever. Let’s take Marylyn Monroe for example, people are still slut shaming her now and the poor woman is dead! What right do any of us have to label somebodies sexual behaviour? I mean, some people like sex, so will act upon this by having lots of sex. Why is this wrong? If no one is getting hurt, why should this person be burnt at the stake? Are we going to start shoving pitchforks up girl’s vaginas if they don’t ‘behave’? How far is this silly shit going to go?

‘…you all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it ok for guys to call you sluts and whores.’ This quote has resonated in my mind since the moment I heard it. One, because it was said by Tina Fey and I love her so much I could stroke her hair for hours and two, because it’s bloody true! We should be on each other’s side, not battling it out against each other. I’ve got friends that boys have called ‘sluts’ and I’ve stuck up for them. Why? Because they don’t really sleep around? Because they’ve not slept with that many people? NO, they’ve slept with loads of bloody people but the point is I don’t fucking care and this does by no means make them a ‘slut’ it makes them a sexual deviant whom I love. Men calling girls sluts is bad enough, but women doing it is fucking silly. Why are fighting over the stuff that men are high fiving over?

Are we threatened by these ‘sluts’? Do we think they’re going to steal all the men and eat their dicks for breakfast? What is it that we’re all so afraid of that makes us act in this tactless manor. Not every girl that sleeps around will sleep with someone’s boyfriend. So maybe she seeks validation, I think looking at the internet today, it’s fair to say we’re all seeking validation. Or maybe, shock horror, she just enjoys having sex? Instead of putting girls down and making them feel shit for their sexual behaviours, let’s just embrace the fact that we’re living in a society that’s more sexually honest and open that it has ever been. Isn’t that kinda empowering?

Let’s all agree to stop bitching on about how many guys a girls slept with, what she did in the back of that van, what she wore to that party and start high fiving each other for being sex goddess’ and rulers of the world.